Never No More
by Sunflora the Flower Child
Summary: revamp. She didn't know what exactly was going on but she found herself in something deep. Secrets from forever ago will be unearthed and revealed. Battles will be won and lost and lives will be taken in vain. Latin spells and soul stealing spirits/entities and two wisps named Merle and Svana used for power conduct. sorry for the crappy summary, but here i am, back from the dead.
1. Awakening

I felt like I was drowning. I couldn't breathe, couldn't see. Well, that was a lie, I could see. I saw him standing above me, his hands around my throat. I knew he wanted me dead, how couldn't he? I was a testament to the woman who ran away from him twelve years ago without a word, his wife. My mother.

Plus, I was useless to him. All I did was take up air and space. I couldn't do anything right.

So now I couldn't breathe and I don't think I was going to live for much longer. My ears were ringing, I couldn't even hear his words of rage, plus I couldn't see properly. Black spots were taking up my vision. I guess this was it and I was going to die.

This seems bittersweet. Very fucking bittersweet. How often have I wished for this right here only for it to be taken from me in such a manner. I didn't want to go like this. I wanted to overdose on pills and go in my sleep. This hurt. I didn't want this.

I shut my eyes tightly, a feeling of heat going through me and to my neck, making him jump away from me.

"L-Leila..." He says in horror, making me scramble up and move away from him as fast as possible. He looks at me, the horror in his eyes and then he closes them, chuckling. "You're like her." He says, laughing louder, running a hand over his face. "You're like her. What, you speak latin too, Leila? Huh?" He shouts, making me jump and wince. "Are you 'awakening' like she said you would?" He spits out. "Do you remember her 'teachings'?"

"I-I don't know what y-y-you're talking a-about." I stutter. I always spoke with a stutter. As long as I could remember I could.

"You're fucking mother you bitch." He says, lunging for me. I put my hands up to defend myself and it sends him flying back.

What the fuck.

I close my eyes tightly, trying not to start crying. I really did it now. He hated it when I tried to defend myself. I could do nothing but take the beatings and sometimes even when I took the beatings, it would make him angry.

I slowly open my eyes and look around. I wasn't hit or anything and there wasn't any yelling. I look down and see him on the ground, not moving and my eyes widen. Did I kill him? How did I kill him? I didn't even touch him, my hands didn't connect or touch him. I wouldn't even have the strength to push him.

I whimper a bit, closing my eyes tightly. What was I going to do? I slowly get off the bed and move over to him. I shakily reach my hand over to his neck to see if he was, in fact, dead or not. I didn't want to because what if he grabs me or something.

I get closer to his neck and with a deep breath I press my fingers to his neck, closing my eyes and searching for a pulse. He was alive and with a sigh, I quickly pull away.

I needed to go. I needed to leave. I look around in a slight panic, snatching up my phone and quickly unlocking it, calling the one person who I knew would run to my rescue no matter what.

Riley Omari Freeman.

He was my best friend. He meant so much to me, it was crazy and according to him it was the same way. He was my ride or die and in turn, I was his. No one and nothing could come in between us.

I waited for three rings until he picked up. "What the fuck, Lei?" He groans, sleep in his voice.

"R-R-R-Riley." I spit out grinding my teeth. "F-fuck, I-I-I need y-y-y-your help."

"What's wrong? Take some deep breaths Leila, your stuttering gets worse when you're panicked." He says, sounding more awake and aware. "What happened?"

"U-u-uh, M-my dad, he-he-he was trying t-to k-k-kill me!"

"He was trying to what? You need me over there? I will fucking kill-"

"Riley, I-I-I don't k-k-k-know w-what happened. H-he was ch-choking m-me and then al-all o-of a sudden h-he pulls away."

"Imma be on my way. Just text me the rest, okay baby girl?" He asks and I nod my head, looking down.

"H-h-hurry. I-I don't k-know when he's g-g-gonna wake u-u-up."

"I got you. I'm on my way out the door right now."

* * *

He looks at my father's non moving body and chuckles. "This karma. Don't know how you did it but fuck."

"I-I don't know either, Riley."

He looks at me and I try not to tremble, but I was still afraid. My father was a force to be reckoned with. If he wanted to kill me he could. He almost did. He would have if I didn't do… whatever it was that I did. I didn't get it, or understand it. All of a sudden, he pulled away from me as if my neck burned his hands. And as thankful and grateful as I was, it didn't make sense.

And then when I put my hands up to stop him from attacking me. I don't know how that pushed him back, especially with enough force to knock him out. How did I do it? And what did my mother have to do with this? How was I like her?

The only thing I really remember of her was how she looked. And the fact that she was Wiccan. If I think hard enough, I can remember following her into a shed one time and seeing a jar full of eyeballs and a dusty old book. But that could be a figment of my imagination. I was a very young child then so my memories could be fucked up.

The memories themselves could also be fake.

"Let's get you the fuck outta here, Lei." Riley says, moving over to my father. "Pack yo shit and imma put him in his bed."

"P-pack? W-where imma g-g-go?"

"With me, duh. You think imma just leave you in here? Fuck no, Leila. Plus, if I do, you gon be with this nigga all fucking day. This nigga don't let you go nowhere, no matter how grown you are."

I look down at my hands. "Riley, h-he s-said I-I-I was like m-my mother."

"Better than being like him. Come on, let's hurry before this nigga wake up and I gotta kill him."


	2. Crazy Dreams

' **She's awakening.** ' Chanted in my head, the voices sounding twisted and distorted. I didn't like it. It was too loud, the voices too piercing. It was too much going on and it was making my head spin.

"Stop." I mutter, but the voices keep going, making my grip my head tightly and close my eyes. "Stop." I groan.

' **She's up, she's up. She's awake.** ' They rejoiced, but there wasn't anything happy going on. I was scared and dizzy. I felt nauseous. I couldn't do this. I had to make them stop. I had to make them shut up.

" _Tace!_ " [shut up] I shout and the voices stop. I take a deep breath and close my eyes.

' _Good awakening, my Mistress._ ' Two voices say, making me open my eyes once more. A man as pale as the moon and a woman as dark as the sky stood in front of me, making my eyes widen. They were both very attractive but… what were they doing here?

The woman looked as if she was the embodiment of African beauty. Her tall and wide afro as white as snow in contrast to her beautiful melanin. She was legit fucking goals and it almost made me drool because she was so stunning. Her big brown eyes so wise and knowing. She reminded me of a mother. She reminded me of Africa, of home.

The man was the opposite. Whereas the woman was full bodied and felt like home, he was skinny -almost too skinny- and felt as if he was cold, distant. His pale blue eyes regarded me with respect and yet it felt as if he couldn't care less. He was like a paradox, his eyes the windows to his soul yet being guarded and closed off.

They both stood before me, as naked as the day they were born and I looked down to see if I was as well. Unlike them, I wore loose black robes and almost sighed with relief.

"U-uh…"

' _I am Svana.'_ The African Queen told me, her voice as smooth as silk.

' _And I, Merle._ ' The Ice Prince says, bowing slightly. ' _We are thy servants._ ' His voice was haughty and filled with a slight amount of arrogance. Not enough to piss me off or anything. It was just… there.

' _Your weapons of sorts._ ' Svana tells me, making me frown.

"Uh, what? Weapons?"

' _You have awakened, Mistress._ ' Svana informs me, making me frown.

"What is that? Where am I? W-wait… Why am I not a stuttering mess right now?"

' _All things that ail you are no more. And you are in thy subconscious._ ' Merle says. ' _Thy powers have awakened, Mistress. And we are beings that do your bidding._ '

"I-I get that but… what the fuck is going on? What powers?"

' _Your mother, Celeste Maeve, or Julia Wilson before she sold her soul, is a witch. Those powers are your birthright._ ' Svana says, making me close my eyes.

"So… I'm a witch?"

' _Yes, Mistress._ ' Merle and Svana say in unison, making me wince.

"You can just call me Leila…. Please."

' _We cannot do such a thing, Mistress._ ' Merle says. ' _You are our Mistress, and we shall call thee as such._ '

"Uh, why does your form of talking switch from time to time."

' _Sometimes it gets hard._ ' Merle informs me, putting his nose into the air. 'I _have to keep up with where to use thee and thy and things of the sort._ '

"Sorry. I'm sure it's challenging."

' _Quite so._ ' Merle says as Svana chuckles. 'B _ut back to business, my Mistress. You are a very powerful being. You have inherited your mother's witch power and…_ ' He turns to Svana who looked at me. He didn't seem to know what to say and at that moment, this felt more like a dream than anything else.

It was a dream. This was all a made up fabrication. I wish I had powers. If I did, then I'd be able to run away and go far, farther than I could ever imagine. I could fly like a bird and leave my father behind and disappear off the face of the Earth, never to be a burden again. Never to see anyone again. Just… alone.

My father probably killed me that night. I probably never had called Riley, never had pushed him away or managed to pry his hands off of my throat. He probably suffocated me to death and this was the outcome.

My soul was probably wandering and these were two other souls that have been drifting for forever, so long they became insane and thought I was some type of beacon or god.

' _And the powers of the being she sold her soul to. You are in possession of another's soul due to your mother's payment._ ' Svana finishes for him after several moments of silence. 'A _nd I understand you think this is unreal, but all will be revealed to you, my Mistress._ '

' _Of course thee would think it was all a joke or dream if such a thing had been brought upon you as this. She was supposed to stay with you, tell you what was going on, to teach you more than just those two measly times. She is cowardly and despicable._ '

"She?" I look at the two. "Who? My mother?"

' _Yes._ ' Svana says, nodding sadly. As if she didn't want me to know that my mother ran away, leaving me with my father. But I knew. I lived the aftermath. I felt it everyday. ' _But she was supposed to do more than just teach you and stay with you, Mistress._ '

"She was supposed to love me." I mutter, looking away. "She was supposed to save me."

' _She was selfish._ ' Merle scoffs, his tone of voice harsh. He was my anger, my hate. My offense.

' _She was afraid._ ' Svana counters, her voice soft and smooth. Caring. Sympathetic. Mindful. She was my heart, my love. My defense.

"She left me." I say, hurt in my voice. "Did she know? Did she know he was going to…"

' _That disgusting man hurt you. He tried to kill you. She knew he would._ '

' _She hoped he wouldn't. She hoped-_ '

"I don't want to hear about what she hoped!" I spit out, turning my eyes to Svana. I was fed up and with Merle feeding me all this anger, there was nothing Svana could say to help. I already harbored anger and hate and pain and sadness and Merle just lit the fire. "She left me! She left me there to die! She left me with him to die!"

It hurt.

' _Mistress-_ '

Why would she leave me?

"No! She wanted this. She wanted me to die! She hated me!"

Was I not good enough? Was I not enough for her? If not stay for my father, why couldn't she stay for me? Or take me with her? Why would she leave me?

' _Mistress!_ '

"Fuck!"

I woke up with a start, shooting up in bed and looking around, breathing heavily. I was in Riley's room, in his bed. But… he wasn't there. "Riley?"

"You… were fucking glowing, Leila." He mutters.

"Where are you?"

"On the damn floor!" He exclaims, making me scramble to the edge of the bed and peer over. He was in fact on the floor, sitting up and looking at me. "I was sleep but some fucking light was on. A bright ass light and when I checked, guess what the fuck the light was?"

"Uhm… me?"

"Yes you." He hisses.

"So… how did you end up on the floor?"

"That's a good ass question. I don't fucking know. When I sat up to look at yo bright ass- wait…" He looks at me, getting up.

"What?"

"You not… stuttering. Why aren't you stuttering?" He asks, getting up. I blink, thinking of my dream, of Merle and Svana. My mother.

"I… I think… I don't know, Riley. I-I don't." I say, getting choked up. Fuck, I was going to cry. She hated me.

"Don't cry, Lei, please don't."

"My… my dream Riley. Merle and Svana-"

"Who they?"

"They told me I was a witch. And I own… someone's soul…"

Riley blinks and clears his throat. "Uhm, fuck, okay."

"Okay? I..." I falter. I believed them, but I didn't expect Riley to be so comfortable with it. To just say okay...

"A lot of crazy shit has happened to me and my brother, Leila." He says somberly. "Crazy shit that has… cost us some people that were close to us." He looks away from me. "So I believe it. Probably more than you."


	3. Souls

One thing I honestly wasn't expecting was for things to go back to normal. Almost. I mean, you would expect that after being told by two guardian spirits that you were a witch and owned half of someone's soul that things would change drastically and that I would be fighting something huge or the sort.

I didn't get any of that.

The only thing that really changed was the fact that I was now living with Huey and Riley and that Merle and Svana pop up every now and then, reminding everyone that I was, in fact, a witch in possession of someone else's soul. Well, half of it. And, I no longer stuttered, so that was a plus. All of this was a plus.

"Ugh! I swear I hate it when y'all pop up like that." Riley exclaims, making me turn around in surprise. "Like, give a nigga a fucking warning! Shit!" He says, settling down next to me on the couch. "I almost swung on yo ass, Merl."

"You have in the past, Master Riley. And it didn't work."

"I know nigga." He says with a slight pout and a huff, making me smile with amusement. "Damn."

"So, what brings you to us, Merle?" I ask, showing him my amused smile.

"Training." He say somberly.

"For what?" Riley asks, saying what I thought. All I did was raise my eyebrow.

" _He's_ looking for you." He says, his serious tone making goosebumps rise on my arms and Riley sit up straight.

"Who?" Riley asks, beating me to the punch yet again. This over curious ass nigga. "If it's her dad, she don't need training. I can handle that nigga-"

"The owner of the other half of the soul you possess, Mistress."

"Well… technically it's his soul so he has every right to come take it back." I say, shrugging. It was no big deal. It's his, he can have it if he wants.

"It's not that simple Mistress. He can't just cleanly remove his soul from your spirit. It has attached itself to yours."

"So… she got one big ass soul in her body? That don't make no damn sense."

"No, Master Riley. A soul isn't a ball of gas or clouds or anything solid. Your soul is an extension of your spirit, just as your physical body is. Forty percent of that flows through your chakra channels, thirty percent serves as a reserve to fill in any gaps. and the last thirty percent seeks for its mate."

"So like a soul mate?"

"This nigga is Leila's soul mate?" Riley asks, a disgusted and displeased look on his face.

"Leila is essentially this man's owner. Leila surpasses the typical amount that is used for soul mates to intertwine and controls half of his heart, fifty percent. That cuts into parts of his chakra and mainly takes away from his reserve, leaving whatever he doesn't have empty, incomplete."

"I'm like… so confused." I mutter, shaking my head. The soul being an extension to your spirit? Runs through your chakra channels? I own this man? This is waaaay too much.

Merle sighs. "Okay, say your soul is pure white." Merle says, a white wisp ball appearing before us.

"Oooh, shit, Merl got tricks." Riley mumbles in my ear, making me snicker a bit and shake my head.

"Your soul is complete, Mistress, his is torn." Merle says, calling my attention back to him. "This isn't what it looks like, but let's imagine it this way for a bit." He says with a chuckle. What seems to be a half of a black wisp ball appears next to the white one. "This is his torn one. It's a painful experience both physically and mentally. So, I feel for the man." Merle mutters with a sigh and I raise my eyebrows. How would he know? Has he experienced it? "Now, the soul is in your body and they haven't exactly merged." His black soul had started to orbit around my white one. "And despite this, it is still hard for him to tear his apart because they aren't exactly two separate beings anymore. If he had found you earlier, he would be able to obtain his soul back without damaging you, a clean and easy process. But since it was your awakening that helped him find you, and by this time his soul has… taken a liking to yours, to put it simply." He says. My eyes were stuck watching the black swirl around the white.

You could tell which was the top of the black soul because it had slightly lodged itself into the white one. That was us. That was his attachment to me and that was going through my chakra channels and wherever else he said souls were. That was inside of me.

"Merle, wouldn't he be in control of me?" I ask, looking up at him with worried eyes. "Because his soul is inside of mine-"

"You overpower him." Merle simply says, giving me a small smirk. "And since you own more than thirty percent of his soul, and he doesn't own a drop of yours, you can control his chakra flow and essentially his body."

"This isn't making any sense. How could that be? Because… what he's missing is inside of _me_. His essence is inside of my body and-"

"Okay, can you not put it like that?" Riley asks, and I roll my eyes.

"How could I control him?" I continue, sighing. My head was starting to hurt.

"What's left of his soul can identify that you own a part of it inside you and that none of you is with it. With that, in a way, his souls are still intact because they can call upon each other and you are able to use that to your advantage. Since your souls have not merged into recognizing itself as one, because you are not lacking any pieces of your soul, it still has its previous identity, which is him. If you two have had an exchange, then his would make up of what you were missing and would become one and the same would happen to him."

"So… is that what happens with soul mates?" I ask and Merle shakes his head.

"Not exactly. That's another lesson for another day."

"This shit makes zero sense tho." Riley says. "I'm not getting any of it."

"Dealing with souls is a complicated process and is only for professionals. But, the owner of the other half will stop at nothing to reclaim his soul. And what doesn't help is that he can feel the presence of his soul."

"Well… why can't I feel him?"

"Again, Mistress, you have provided him with nothing."

"Ooooh." I nod, understanding. Well, just that. I didn't get much of anything else, put it was starting to put itself together a little bit.

"My fucking head hurts." Riley groans, getting up.

"Whether you completely understand or not, it does not get rid of the fact that training is required."

"Well, I can control him, can't I? Can't I just say go the fuck away and leave it at that?" I ask as Riley walks out of the room.

"You must be able to call upon his soul in order to control him and since you cannot even call upon your own soul, I don't think that would go well. Training is a must, Mistress and we will first teach you how to call upon your own chakra before we try to call upon his own."

I sigh at his slightly harsh words and lower my head, getting up. "That's understandable. Who is this dude anyway?"

"He is a half demon, Cairo, the son of a demon your mother sold her soul to."

"All of her soul?" I ask, my mouth open a bit in shock. Does that mean she's dead?

"Yes." Merle nods. "In exchange, you have gained half of his son's soul. That was the deal."

"Is she… is she dead?"

"No, she is very much alive." Merle says with thinly veiled disgust in his voice. I was starting to think that his anger and hatred of her had nothing to do with me. He hated her on his own and I was starting to get very curious about what it was. I just wasn't ready to ask him. "She is simply a husk of a human, waiting for her master's orders."

"Oh." I mutter, my hands flying to my chest. Hearing that hurt. "So… the state she's in now is my fault."

"No." Merle says, his voice stone cold. "She was selfish. She risked everyone's life and got people killed because of this deal, because she thought that you would have the capability to overthrow _him_ and she killed Svana and-"

"She killed Svana? How?" I gaped, my eyes wide. What the hell happened?

"She's a thief, Mistress." He hisses. "She stole souls and tricked people. She tricked us into being tied to you. She has ruined everyone around her and now that she is an empty husk, just like the rest of those who surrounded her is karma. It's her right to be in that state and she got everything she deserved from _him_."

"Who is him?"

"He is your-"

"Merle, that's enough." Svana says, materializing next to me and placing a hand on my shoulder. I felt her warmth despite the fact that she was only a spirit and closed my eyes. I felt guilty and ashamed. Whatever my mother did to Merle and Svana left an impression on Merle and I felt terrible. He held more hate for her than my own father it seemed.

His hate was his own. He truly wasn't my anything. Not my anger, not my hate, nor was Svana my loving or my heart. They were their own beings who were dragged into whatever destruction my mother caused for them and then they were tied to her daughter, forced to follow whatever order she gave.

Just like my mother. Just like Cairo.

"And even now," He spits out to Svana, his tone filled with venom and pure anger. "You protect that woman."

"You forget, Merle, she was once our friend."

"And you forget, Svana. She is our murderer." He responds and with that he disappears, making me bite my bottom lip.

"Do not worry, Mistress." Svana says, her hand falling from my shoulder. I look up at her, into her sad eyes and almost tear up. "It will take some time for him to get over it. It's harder for him."

"I… I just wanna get trained." I mutter, lowering my head. I didn't want drama and anger. I just wanted to give this man, half demon, whatever the fuck he is, his soul back and go on about my life.

I feel like I spoke too soon about things being almost normal. I feel like I fucking jinxed myself.

* * *

 **i hope everything about the souls and shit made sense. if not, please please please let me know so i could clarify and make the chapter better. thanks.**


End file.
